|Posted on July 28, 2017 at 7:40 PM|
Raise your hand if you've experienced this since the loss of your loved one. I too have went through the same thing. It seems that it is part of the experience of losing a loved one. Unfortunately I've had so many people leave my life and my sons lives.
I'm not sure if they can't deal with seeing you grieve, if they were really only my husband's "friend", or what. At the beginning, everyone was around. People were calling, texting, asking if we needed anything. Then after a few weeks, we were left with very few and we felt very alone. We had many people tell us; I'm here anytime you need to me, call me if you need anything, etc. I think people say that to sound nice but they don't really mean it. I say that because those people who told us that were MIA.
Anyone who has lost a loved one will tell you that you after the funeral is over and everyone goes back to their lives, that's when the help and support is really needed. I remember, I couldn't even drive myself to and from work, or my children to and from school. I was so low, I was barely functioning. I thank God for the people who helped me during that time. They took me to work, picked me up. They took the boys to school, picked them up, went to the grocery store for me, etc. Eventually, I was able to resume my duties. But, just think if I didn't have those "few" to help me.
If you have lost a loved one, I'm sure you agree. If you are a friend or family member of someone who has lost a loved one, remember that they need you. There is no magic date when grief is over and boom they won't need assistance. Reach out to your widowed friends. Invite them over, call or text them. They will be so grateful if you do. It's so important to BE THERE!
I had a dear Brother in The Lord tell me when I was voicing to him my complaints about people not being there for myself and my sons. He told me, Sis, there are people who want to be there for you and the boys but you have to let them in. He said stop focusing on who isn't there and focus on the ones who are. He was so right. When I changed my mindset, I realized that we had people we could call, (maybe not who we expected), but nevertheless God has blessed us with BONUS family. And I appreciate them greatly!
If you think about it, there is someone who has been there for you and your family since the death of your loved one. It's human nature to focus on the negative more than the positive. Even if 10 people left your life and 1 stayed, that is still a blessing. And if not, pray for God to send you someone.
Remember that God is always there. He promises to never leave us or forsake us.
Hebrews 13:5 B) for He hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.